Last night I saw a patient. She was 29. She. Was. Also. A. Retard!
"So I put in a tampon today and now I can't find it! I even asked my boyfriend to look but he can't find it either."Deep breath in!
This is excatly what I feel like doing at 11pm, hunting for a lost tampon.
"Are you sure you didn't take it out and that you don't remember!"
"I definitely didn't take it out. And I am worried as I've forgotten to take one out before for 3 weeks and it was really gross and........"STOP right there! I do not want details.
I examine her and do not find the "lost" item.
"It's definitely not there. Maybe try remembering if you remove it or not next time, or write it down."eg......
10:00am - insert tampon
16:00pm - insert ANOTHER tampon
04:00 - realise I am a retard and rush to the ER in the middle of the night
Note to self: do NOT procreate!!!
So this week's tip: Keep track of your tampon :)