Trumps = Fuckheads!

I know these photos have been doing the rounds, but I just have to give my own 2 cents worth...

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These photos were taken 2 years ago when Eric and Donald Trump Junior went on a hunting trip to Zimbabwe. People argue that the money they spent to kill these beautiful creatures is going towards conservation. What kind of an oxymoron is that? Kill animals to protect them from being killed by others, makes no fucking sense to me.

In case you were wondering, that is not a tree stump that Don is holding, but an elephant's tail. It wasn't enough to murder it, he had to maim the animal by cutting off it's tail as proof of his power.

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Wow a buffalo! You are the man, well done!

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This one actually makes me want to cry! A leopard is one of the most beautiful wild animals out there. It is such a treat to get to spot one in the wild!

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I wonder if they needed a stylist to choose the vast array of different shades of khaki outfits they wear? The fact that these 2 Hollywood zeros actually managed to shoot so many animals makes me think they might have been tethered in a pen and this is why we only get the "after" shots.

All I can say, is that I think it is absolutely disgusting and I would like to see one of their heads as a stuffed wall trophy!


LMM

xoxo

I love/hate students!

Every 4 weeks we get new students. At times they can be incredibly annoying or slightly helpful, but no one really loves having students around.

The 4th year ones are there to catch their required 10 babies. They know nothing. They have not seen many vaginas. Especially the ones with babies head's coming out of them. They scare easily and they have never worked a night shift before. Invariably you will find them either asleep in a corner or fainting from sheer horror at seeing blood, placenta, shit and baby parts, in no particular order.

The 6th years know nearly nothing. This is the year when they practice being interns, which is what they will be next year. They have seen a few vaginas. They have never worked a night shift since 4th year. Their job is to help the intern and assist you whilst you do the casear (ie they hold shit for you during the operation). They will either be found asleep in the corner or asleep in your bed, which is fucking annoying when you are actually lucky enough to get to go and sleep.

At the end of their 4 weeks we have a meeting, where we discuss how retarded they are, whilst eating cake and drinking tea. It is the highlight of the month! No one holds back, from consultants to interns. We slate their personalities and shred the essence of their very existence. Then we give them a mark. If they are SUPER shit, we never fail them. That would mean that they would have to come back for another 4 weeks and that would be even worse than passing a shit student.

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LMM

xoxo

Awesome song

I am absolutely in love with this new song by Chiano Sky........... LOVE!

Lovely lyrics too...




LMM

xoxo

F&%king C-R-A-Z-Y

I have said this countless times, although I never can quite say it enough...

NOTHING and I say nothing, brings out the crazy like a woman in labour!



I was on call on Friday night. It was the usual combo of millions of caesars and fun and games in the labour ward. When you have worked in a labour ward for a while, you don't even notice the screaming of women giving birth. It just becomes the norm to have shrieking, grunting and even crying as background noise.

ENTER 19 year old patient.......no....19 year old CRAZY patient! This patient definitely used drugs. No amounts of morphine could dull her pain and she only weighted 45kg. This little package of dynamite came without front teeth, a foul mouth and with the biggest attitude I have ever seen. During labour, she broke expensive equipment that monitors the baby's heart rate, swore at me on multiple occasions, pinched me and even tried to hit me. Her favourite was to scream "Mooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyy" during each contraction. I eventually phoned her Mom, thinking she might instill some sanity. She was a 20 year older version of the patient, and now I had 2 of them to deal with.

As the baby's head was crowning, she refused to push, instead choosing to stick her hands into her vagina. How this was going to help, I did not know, unless she wanted to deliver her own baby, anyhoo. The absolute best was when she started pinching her own nipples and screaching "Jesus!". The baby's head had not moved a millimetre. When we ordered her to push, she grunted with all her might, yet the baby's head went nowhere. Eventually after much coaxing the little thing was born absolutely flat and very lifeless. After giving it some oxygen and good rub down, it eventually started crying. As I dried the small infant, I said to it...
"Sorry small baby, but your Mom is fucked in the head. Your life will not be easy!"

Mean, but true!



LMM

xoxo